Being With the One You Love
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It stands black and naked against an overcast November sky.
It seems dismal, even sad. But, of course, it has no such feelings; it’s simply
doing what deciduous trees do. It has no self-consciousness. We observe it and
think about it or contemplate it but it has no ability to reciprocate. Partly
because of this, we say that we humans are a higher form of life.
It reminds me how much greater the difference there must be between
the human form of life and that of God. So much so that we can think of God
only by analogy. He/she is father/mother, creator, a “person” in which “we live and move and have our
being,” says Paul in a speech recorded in the Acts of the Apostles. But that,
and all language regarding God, is only analogous to what we know from human existence.
If We're Lucky, at Church
That doesn’t mean that we can’t “know” God on some level. We
sometimes feel his/her presence in nature, in other people and if we’re lucky,
at church.
Ironically, many people say they don’t go to church because
they don’t find God there. Their deepest spiritual yearnings aren’t fulfilled,
they say. They may presume that other people there are tuned in, but they feel
very little, if anything, of the divine.
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Diarmuid O'Murchu
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For them, “church” is, indeed, a waste of time. But it
doesn’t have to be.
Going to church doesn’t make much sense if we don’t already
have a relationship with God. And the most direct way to relate to God is
through prayer. “Church,” after all, is being in communion with a community of
believers, of fellow pray-ers, however tepid and fragile their faith and ours.
If you don’t have such a relationship, how could you appreciate the importance
of church?
That may be, you may say, but isn’t praying really talking
to yourself? You can “speak to God” all you want, but he/she won’t answer. If
going to church is a waste of time, praying may be even more so.
I believe many people feel this way partially because of a
restricted idea of what constitutes prayer. Many see prayer in a narrow way –
asking God for something – and being frustrated if they don’t get it.
Prayer, in my opinion, starts with the notion of who God is
and his/her role in my life. If I see God as Father, as Jesus consistently
presented him in the New Testament, we will feel a need to communicate with him/her.
(I try to use the pronouns he/she and him/her in this blog
because many people prefer thinking of God as feminine and I’m sure God
approves because, of course, God is neither. Jesus used “Father” to conform to
the culture of his time.)
A prayer that asks for something, traditionally called
prayer of petition, is OK, but sticking to the parent analogy, we have to
realize that parents don’t always give children what they ask for, and children
seldom understand why their parents do or don’t.
Don't Neglect Other Forms
But we shouldn’t neglect other forms of prayer, such as
adoration, contrition and thanksgiving. Prayer may or may not change God, but it
certainly changes us, and it’s an important part of the historical story about the relationship between God
and us.
“…Beyond the facts that can be quantified and verified is a
story that is both complex and elegant,” writes Diarmuid O’Murchu in the
afterward of William Cleary’s book, “Prayers to an Evolutionary God.” The story
is peppered with ‘unknowns’ and contains paradoxes and contradictions. But it
is susceptible to an investigation that opens us up to mystery and wonder,
sentiments that can be called prayer. Mystics have known this transparency of
nature since time immemorial.”
Adds Cleary: “Our personal prayer life brings the divine
presence into our consciousness, and we carry that presence forward wherever we
go.”
It’s relatively easy to feel God’s presence at a place like
New Melleray. You can absorb the silence and pray with the monks. And it
reminds you that sometimes, prayer is merely a matter of being with the one you
love.
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