All or Nothing?

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I’m a life-long believer, born and raised a Catholic and having almost all of my formal education provided by church-related institutions.

But my journey along the road of faith has been bumpy due to the potholes of doubt and uncertainty. Often, I stuck with it out of sheer willpower, and a lot of help from God.

I’m glad I did. But I believe my doubts along the way have made it easier for me to relate to people who haven’t stayed with it, or who can’t bring themselves to embrace faith.

Much Calmer

My doubts were “all over the place,” starting with the existence of God. I still have flashes of doubt but I’m much calmer about them. And one of the truths that have guided me is that faith is not an “all or nothing” proposition, that there are degrees of faith along with degrees of doubt, especially about such things as church doctrine and authority.

An article in a recent issue of American Magazine deals with this subject. Written by Elizabeth Hansen, a Catholic wife and mom from Michigan, it describes what she learned about doubt from various sources.

One of the sources, surprisingly, is the 1968 book, Introduction to Christianity by Joseph Ratzinger, who became Pope Benedict XVI, leading the Catholic Church from 2005 until he resigned in 2013. Ordained a priest in 1951, Ratzinger was a highly regarded theologian by the late 1950s. He was appointed a full professor in 1958 at age 31 and had a long career as professor of theology at several German universities.

Ratzinger referred to “the faith and doubt” of St. Therese of Lisieux, who died in 1897 at the age of 24. A French Carmelite nun, she is a highly influential model of sanctity for Catholics and others because of the simplicity and practicality of her approach to the spiritual life.

Joseph Ratzinger
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St. Therese was haunted by doubt, seeing the loss of faith as a “lurking abyss,” a “question of all or nothing,” according to the America article.

“But Ratzinger isn’t fazed by such doubt – not even when it stares into the “bottomless abyss,” writes Hansen. “In fact, he goes further, connecting uncertainty to mature belief.”

Faith is not a straight-line road, like an interstate highway across Nebraska. The road of faith has lots of curves, hills and heavy traffic, and you often have to stop at a rest area. And you’re always subject to distractions.

Among the questions that are often asked about this journey, is why it’s easy for some people and hard – or nearly impossible – for others? Faith is considered by traditional Christian theology as a gift from God. So, why does he give it to some and not to others?

The only honest answer is “We don’t know.”

But gift or not, it’s a two-way road. From what we know from the Bible, theologians and philosophers, God is always seeking us out. Whether we’re aware or not, we're enfolded in God's loving embrace. It’s up to us to respond to his/her love.

Rarely All or Nothing

This may take a long time, however, and if we seek him/her in religion – which I believe is the ordinary and for most, best way to find him/her – it’s rarely “all or nothing.” We make decisions about the quantity and quality of our faith along the way. It may take a lifetime to embrace all or most of what our faith professes.

I believe that’s what Jesus was talking about when he told the stories about the sower and the seed (Mt. 13), the “talents” (Mt. 25) and his teaching about degrees of faithfulness and its rewards (Mt. 5).

The last reference is about “the kingdom of heaven,” but despite the challenges that faith entails, faith also provides rewards here on earth. And they include, if we choose them, the rewards of belief itself. This is evident in this passage from Psalm 93.

When I think, “I have lost my foothold;
Your mercy, Lord, holds me up.
When cares increase in my heart,
Your consolation calms my soul.